ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
