I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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