Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
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sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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