I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
