Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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