Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Randomize
