Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
