I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Houston, we have a squirter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize