Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
