There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I wish you could order shots online.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
