i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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