"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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