Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Randomize
