Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
