question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
