you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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