absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
