you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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