Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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