he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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