He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize