If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize