and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
