i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
My vagina is very pro this idea
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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