Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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