I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
They have beer where we have blood.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
