Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize