i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
we're so committed to being not committed
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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