i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
you will always have a special place in my vag
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize
