gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
