I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
