I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
