seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
