her vagine was all disorganized.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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