areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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