Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
the liver wants what the liver wants
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize