he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
