Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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