I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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