is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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