we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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