dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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