We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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