did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
