its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
pray to the hookup gods
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
