I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
