He is such a slut. More and more my type.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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