so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You ate ashes out of my bong
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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