I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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