I want to stick my p in your. b.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
