Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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